Austin Coté Williams...
...is a mad man.
Austin Coté Williams......is a mad man. |
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| Apr. 19th, 2012 @ 05:07 pm Job interview | |||
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Man: (In an incredibly smooth voice) One last question: Do I make you (dramatic pause) Horny? Woman: ...what?! Man: Do I fill you with the desire to (dramatic pause) engage in sexual activities? Woman: ...no. (said almost as if it's a question, in order to imply "are you serious?") Man: Good! Excellent! We need someone with that level of... strength and resolve. Consider yourself part of the team! |
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| Apr. 9th, 2012 @ 07:50 am Dream | |||
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I had a dream last night that my mom had bought some dwarf children with big harry arms from a trade caravan that was passing through. She had bought them in order to cheer up my brother, who was wheelchair bound (mightily inconvenient, because he was upstairs when it had happened and thus was unable to come down.) The dwarf children seemed to be having fun playing around the old and Mangy lion that lived in our yard. Mother and I left them to and stepped inside so that she could mix up Shane's medicine. I was bringing it upstairs to him when I tripped and a few drops of it splashed into my eyes. When I reached the top of the stairs I wiped my eyes clear, but the world was still fuzzy and seemed to sway and shimmer with the most unusual colors. I looked down the stairs to see the lion at the bottom, only made from dancing splinters of gold and copper and with red glowing eyes the pulsed along with my heart beat. It turned its head, though for a moment, a black and white shadow of its face remained staring at me, its lips twitching as if it were whispering something too quietly for me to hear. Then it roared, but the sound of its voice was overlaid with electronic distortion and the sound of metal grinding against metal. I backed from the stairway, but the world was still lurching, so I fell to my hands and knees, and then crawled to my brother in his wheelchair. I spoke to him and my voice as well came out with more than a hint of electronic distortion: "I think that your medicine is LSD," I told him, "This does not seem to me like it would be the best idea." Shane responded only with a smile and by letting his nose and lips melt a little. I awoke relieved to find my perception of the world correct in all respects. |
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| Dec. 15th, 2011 @ 01:49 pm Gasoline Discount | |||
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| My local gas station has this amazing deal where you can save five cents per gallon of gas that you purchase if you sign up for a credit card with them. FIVE CENTS! It's amazing! Of course, that five cent savings is only applied to the first gallon of every purchase... And it's only discounted from a maximum of one hundred gallons per month... So, five times a hundred... that's a whopping total of... FIVE DOLLARS PER MONTH! Awwwww shit yeah!!!! And all I have to do to get it is purchase gas there a little more than three times every day! Best Deal Ever!!!!* * It's reasons like this that reading the fine print is incredibly important. |
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| Nov. 2nd, 2011 @ 04:58 am I wrote a short story! | |||
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| I was told to never try and change who you are for anyone, but I didn't listen. I changed for someone once - a pretty girl who I thought at the time had a heart of gold. When I realized that I didn't like who I had become, I tried to change back, but it turns out that some changes can effect you for a lifetime, and that you can never really change back - you can only change forward. And so I changed and I changed, trying harder and harder to reclaim the things that I had once been, all the while getting further and further away from my ideal by zigs and zags. And then one day, I realized that I had changed so much that I didn't even remember what it was that I was trying to change back into. Optional Funny ending And that's why I became a politician! |
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| Oct. 29th, 2011 @ 04:46 pm So apparently I'm pregnant... | |||
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I keep having dreams where I a middle aged naked pregnant woman. It's subtle, though. The dreams don't go out of their way to call attention to this. There's be a scene in the dream where I'm straightening my hair in the mirror or some such, and when I look back on it after waking up, I'll realize that rather than looking at a reflection of myself, I'll be looking at the reflection of a middle aged naked pregnant woman. I'm sure thta this is symbolic of something, but there are so many different ways to interpret it that I'm not willing to venture a guess at this time. It's not uncommon for me to be female in my dreams, but this development is new. |
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| Oct. 4th, 2011 @ 02:16 pm bad dreams | |||
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| It's gotten to the point where I'm starting to dread sleeping. My dreams have been so unpleasant lately that I wake up not wanting to remember them. There's one in particular that's been giving me trouble for a few weeks now - recurring dreams aren't typically something that happen to me, but I just can't seem to shake this one. - but every time I try and write it down, it's a combination of too painful and too awkward for me to get the words all out. |
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| Apr. 30th, 2011 @ 09:24 am Christopher Reeve | |||
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Corey: I am needed in Kalamazoo today, care to grab lunch somewhere? Austin: Only if lunch is before 10 or after 6, because otherwise: wedding. Corey: That seems to push it into a whole different mealtime. Austin: I know... but we can always pretend that we're in a different time zone. Corey: Or we could fly counter to the earth's axis fast enough to make it spin backwards, thereby making time go in reverse. Corey: It worked for Christopher Reeve. Austin: I knew that Christopher Reeve had trouble walking, but I always assumed that wheelchairing, as opposed to flying, was his primary means of locomotion. Corey: At one point in time it was horseback. Corey: That didn't work out so well. Austin: lol |
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| Apr. 26th, 2011 @ 08:25 am Sometimes I like to make fun of people | |||
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| I personally don't like FFDSHOW, because it is huge and installs a lot of things in my system and I'm want to stay far away from it. I like something lighter : CCCP, which is basically a light and simplified version of FFDSHOW - An idiot on a message board. FFDShow is included in the CCCP for the purpose of having a single application doing the job of many. Today CCCP uses the improved ffdshow-tryouts. - the CCCP wiki "I'm big and important and know what I'm talking bout. Also, I have opinions that supersede facts" - me pretending to be the guy from the first quote. |
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| Apr. 24th, 2011 @ 03:11 pm this just in | |||
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| News reporter: (is handed a piece of paper) This just in. (begins reading the sheet of paper) Ha ha. Made you say "this just in". (looks back up at the camera) More on this as the situation develops. Back to you, Carol. |
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| Apr. 24th, 2011 @ 12:22 am D'oh! | |||
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| After reading up on the complexities of yuy2 and yv12 colorspaces, I came to the realization that I'm an idiot. Do you remember the last time I said that I was an idiot because I hadn't noticed that each line of Chroma was different and unique? Well, I have no idea what made up data I was seeing through my magical glasses that day, but the way that yuy2 and yv12 colorspaces work, it's just not possible. which is exactly what I remembered being the case to begin with! I even said it right here! Look, I'll just leave this here, and so long as you don't tell anyone, we can just pretend that this never happened... function FixInterlace(clip c) { |
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